They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
two words: eviction party
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Randomize