Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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