i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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