Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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