oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Randomize
