my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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