My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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