She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize