i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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