"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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