Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Is Oprah even human
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
