so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
