He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
