Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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