If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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