Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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