Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
