He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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