i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
