whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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