my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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