Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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