It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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