I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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