I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
