sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Randomize
