Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Randomize
