Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
