I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
