it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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