Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
