i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
