Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
