I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Randomize
