on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
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