Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Please, let me fuck your mom
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Randomize