I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize