what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
