So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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