Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
