I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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