My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize