did you get engaged???
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize
