i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
