I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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