I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
