..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
