Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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