My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
