I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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