Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize