Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
There r osticjed everywhere
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
