So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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