I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
